February Lies Ahead

This is it. This is the month that I dread each winter. I believe that February is the greyest, coldest, longest, worst month of the entire year. And guess what? That good-for-nothing rodent "Phil" saw his shadow on this: another non-descript, grey February day.

But truly, 2 days in, February has been marvelous! Lovely blue skies and SUN appeared on the 1st. (And I should mention the Steeler's amazing victory on the same day!) Today this amazing sunset was visible out the girls' bedroom window.

It can't be all bad, right?

T

Running

I used to be a runner. I'm pretty much of a wimp, so none of that "running through the pain" for me. I'd stop and walk if it hurt, and bad weather kept me in. I discovered Track & Field in High School after I made the realization that I was too uncoordinated to play team sports. In Track, I was usually the only one I could hurt. I ran 100m, 200m, 400m and relays, short stuff in other words. My senior year, my friends convinced me to come out for Cross Country, they needed another body on the team. Thus I discovered long distance running (see "wimp" above.) I also discovered the silence, the solitude, and my breathing. I continued the 200m and 400m in college, but dropped out of Cross Country after the first week of practice, including 5 mile runs at 6 AM.

A friend convinced me to run a 5K race with her when I turned 30. "It's for a good cause." she pleaded, "and it's only about 2 miles."

A 5K is 2.2 miles, to be exact. But why quibble? I ran it. I beat my friend. I won a medal. I wasn't hooked, but...well...intrigued. I ran 3 or 4 5Ks a year for the next 2 years until I got pregnant with J. Most of the time, I got a medal too. Not because I was good, but because there were surprisingly few people in my age category: Female, 30-35. I trained on my treadmill at home, because we lived on top of a hill: 30 minutes at 50% incline and 3 miles per hour, plus a warm up and cool down.

Come to think of it, I've lived on top of a hill for the past 10 years. Living in town this winter, with the remarkably flat, remarkably wide sidewalks, the girls and I have been doing a lot of walking. It's been fun and educational. Yesterday we re-examined the tank at the VFW, peeked through the gate at the WU football field, counted 107 cars on the train going by, looked at the Middle School, inspected the old log Court House, and discussed the various forms of architecture around town.

Yesterday, I thought "I think maybe I'd like to start running again." Think of it! Running on flat, wide sidewalks, finding silence and solitude and time to myself and my own breathing. It sounds lovely until I look at the thermometer this morning. It's 28* outside, and still a bit dark-ish at 7 AM.

Maybe tomorrow I'll run.

T

BRRRRR.....

The thermometer is registering 8 degrees outside at the moment, and the wind has been howling all day. We thought something was scratching at our front door half the day until we realized that is was our Christmas wreath blowing in the wind and finally brought it in. The sky was so blue and clear today that I was hoping we could get out and stretch our legs a bit (the girls weren't interested yesterday), but the wind nipped that idea in the bud.

I'm finding myself feeling restless already...and it isn't even January yet. Restless and anxious. Why aren't the builders out there DOING something? We drove past our old house today and I felt some jealously bubbling up. They have room to MOVE, room to get out the Christmas decorations, the freedom to go in a room and be by themselves! Oh lordy, it's going to be a long winter!

We are making do with our tippy-top of a tree, donated to us by the Lions Club Christmas tree lot. I discovered recently that J is highly allergic to trees, so perhaps we shouldn't have one at all! The girls are SO excited, and J has been counting down the days for a couple of weeks. We are done with school for the next 2 weeks, so now we can put more time and effort into celebrating! We are planning to bake cookies tomorrow, and perhaps I can get the girls to work on the Christmas gifts we have been planning.

J's allergies, particularly to dust mites, gives me license to fulfill my obsessive-compulsive desires to clean, although Hubby has mentioned that it could be the reason she has issues in the first place. I think it's more likely inherited, as my brother has terrible allergies and asthma, but that's neither here nor there. Unfortunately the cleaning takes me 30 minutes at the most, so at some point I'm going to have to face the piles of photos that need to be put into scrapbooks.

Well, the noise level next door is escalating at 11:45 PM, so I guess I should retire to my bedroom, where I can't hear them, but hear the Greene Street traffic and the train very well. Ah...for a house in the country!

T

Home is where the heart is.

I'm tired...physically and emotionally drained, plus a little high from magic marker fumes I think. I lost count of the boxes of books after 14, it's probably closer to 20 now, plus a few in the basement that we didn't have room on the bookshelves for. Can you believe that I took 3 big bag fulls to the Library for their sale? All this stuff just makes me want to start handing things out on the street corners to people. I've found Freecycle quite liberating lately.

Ah, but life goes on despite my mental state. We should know this weekend if we get to winter on Porter Street or in an apartment. Just knowing where we are heading in a few weeks would ease some of the anxiety. I always tend to make mountains out of mole hills, but I've built this one up to rival Mt. Everest. I have peaked in my stressed-out abilities.

I was contemplating tonight about leaving this house, and honestly, I feel nothing. I'm not sure if I am numb because of stress or I have really matured to the level of not having an overwhelming attachment to another thing. I brought both of my babies to this house, watched them crawl, then run and climb. I have gardened more than I have since I was a child, growing up in Idaho. I have painted nearly every square inch of these walls, and cleaned it all over and over (and over) again. There were a lot of memories made inside these walls, and out in the fresh country air too. But the really important things are those 2 beautiful little girls snuggled up in their beds, and my big teddy bear of a husband...those are the things I need to feel content and at home.

Even if we have to end up living in a van...down by the river.

T

Calming Presence

We broke out the flannel sheets this week...ah...the comfort of snuggling into bed where the sheets are soft and warm. It softens the blow of the coming winter cold somewhat. The soft flannel sheets, comfy bed: relax and hibernate for the winter.

If only we could apply the flannel sheets principle to life. I know I could use a buffer against some of the stuff life throws at me. Just this week, my husband and I were discussing my near melt-down with the girls, and how I could possibly have handled the situation better. "They just need a calming presence." he said.

I've been thinking about that for the last few days: a calming presence. I think most of the craziness that goes on in our house is really coming from ME! If I could wrap us all up in a flannel sheet of comfort when things are not going the way I would like, instead of going off the deep end, we would all be happier. My husband is definitely the calming presence in our home, and now, I am trying to follow his example for a more relaxed home.

T

Spring Break

In another hour and a half, I will not only be finished with work at the University for this week, but I will be finished for almost TWO weeks! Hooray...next week is Spring Break! What a relief to not have to take the girls to babysitters (and all that entails) twice in one week for a while!

It can't come too soon. We need a break. The girls have been naughty little buggers today...destructive, fighting, yelling, breaking things, hurting each other...it just won't stop. Good thing Waynesburg doesn't have a local troupe of gypsies, or I'd sell the both of them right about now.

If only we could see some sun again! Everything seems so dirty. The van is so filthy that I can hardly stand to open the doors. Every time our scant snow fall melts, it reveals the many branches and leaves littering the lawn. In contrast, the basement guest room is looking fresh and clean in its coat of "String of Pearls". Today I ripped out some redundant trim in the neighboring "media room" downstairs, and filled in all the nail holes. Tomorrow I can start making that room look brighter as well, and hopefully speak to the carpet guy about putting in some sparkling, new carpet, untouched by rodent feet!

The groundhog said 6 more weeks of winter...aren't we anywhere close to seeing SPRING?

T

Points

Man, it's cold tonight! Brrr! I just left Merry snuggled under flannel and out of that little nest, I'm rather chilly!

Are we meeting this week? T and I are free tomorrow night, though I must admit I am so cold and rather tired I don't feel like leaving my house. Tomorrow, despite Elspeth's being sick, I must leave in the morning to collect some groceries, but then we're back in quarantine again. Merry, who is not sick, and who missed a lovely tea at her friend J's house today and who does not have any formal school at Aunt N's house this week, and who wants to go visit Aunt S and her boys, is sad about being quarantined with us, but then that's life.

I did watch "Jane Austen Book Club" and despite his intentions to get some work done, Martin got sucked in--and it was a really fun watch. Would anyone be interested in vegging at my place--I don't mind watching it over again. Otherwise, unless anyone says "Hey, wait a minute!" and wants to borrow it, I'll return it tomorrow in the mail.

Anything else of practicality to share? Baked a simple-super but simply-great vanilla cake today. . .Kashi is on sale on Amazon, and Celestial Seasonings is on an-order-get-an-instant-rebate on Amazon. . .as T was good enough to alert me, Lands End is running their blow-out sale. . .grapes (nonorganic) are a pretty good price at Giant Eagle starting tomorrow. . .and that may be it.

Since I have been steeping myself and Merry in English children's books lately, I feel like ordering British chocolate bars and going out for walks with my baby in a pram and having a muffin and a milk and a window-washing man drop by every day and walking to shop at market with my big basket, and knowing all my neighbors and of course having sunshine or at least having a good sturdy pair of Wellingtons in cheerful yellow. And having a delightful, wonderful bakery just down my road stocked with currant buns and fresh biscuits and crusty loaves. Anyone else fantasizing about English/European public transportation and food right about now? Or is it just me?

Oh, postscript: go visit 4obsessions . .I always enjoy that blog, as well as thistledown.


K

Oh, for a vacation!

Yep, right on time! In mid-February, after things have settled down after the Holidays and our string of winter birthdays, the BLAHS hit me. When the outside looks grey and dingy, suddenly everything takes on a worn and dirty feeling, and I don't feel satisfied with much at all. Of course, the recent fevers and lack of sleep may be contributing to this overall disinterest with life in the Burg.

I want to escape! Recently, I've been dreaming of castles in Europe. My friend in Germany, however, tells me that their days are equally grey and non-descript as well. My cousin in Sitges, Spain has a lovely blog filled with gorgeous photos of architecture, olive picking and the sea (check it out: http://www.kingsinspain.blogspot.com/ ), I'm sure they would welcome a winter-sick visitor from the states!

Today, there is sunshine! Ah...shine on great star! We are headed to our property for a hike, and a stop by the township park/playground on the way back. Perhaps the fresh air and sunshine will scrub the windows of my soul, and allow good old Waynesburg to look a bit more sparkly.

A good weekend to you, my friends!

T

Easy-To-Do Winter Inactivities

I tried several times to make this larger & easier to read, without success.

On my computer, at least, when I click on the image, I can view a larger one.

Any suggestions, Kim?